Goodness Gracious Me!

As you may know, I visited the southern portion of this great state this past week. I am happy to report that I lived through the experience, but not without sacrificing a small percentage of my soul to the great wasteland that is Columbus, GA and it's surrounding areas. I did not do it willingly; it was stolen from me. Fortunately, the way soul-stealing works (at least with me) is as soon as the buildings of Atlanta are visible from the freeway, the portion that was stolen is immediately returned back to me and all is well. The suffering is undone. I do not completely understand how it works, but I am thankful nonetheless.

Despite this painful process, I did try to enjoy what I could while I was ensnared in the thickets of hell on earth. I took some pictures. I make some funnies. I did some laughs. I tried to focus on the good things surrounding me: cows, peachtrees, grass, summer thunderstorms, heat lightning, fireflies, and vegetable gardens. But I could not entirely escape the insufferable boredom that accompanies these beautiful things. As soon as I stuck my head out of the window to breathe in a lungful of that precious polluted air, I felt real comfort and joy.

Creatures of the Night, Unite!

I forgot to describe the plethora of lightning bugs that I spotted on the way to TN a couple of weeks ago. I felt like a kid with her nose pressed against the glass in the van. I thought I was hallucinating at first, but I focused my eyes enough and the bugs were bright enough so that for several miles, I saw lots of tiny flashes of light along the highway. There were millions of them in the evergreens. I was so excited, I thought surely the locals would have been writing a blurb or two in the newspapers, at least the editorials. Right? I would much rather read about trillions of lightning bugs than half the stuff that's going on today. Can't I just bury my head in the sand and it will all go away?

Speaking of flashing things, I'm researching bioluminescent bays in Costa Rica. I know Puerto Rico has some famous phosphorescence, but surely CR has some, too. It's been sort of a priority{wish} for years now.

Caving and Korean Stinkyfruit

So, I went on a spelunking adventure last weekend which, much to my surprise, also turned out to be a nudist camp/naked hot tub adventure for the so inclined. (*If you are interested in participating in future events, check out The AOC's website.) This was my first event, so I don't know how crazy all the events are. I'm guessing that if there is alcohol involved and it's an overnight stay, all kinds of things happen in all kinds of tents. Just remember that bonfires purify and you should be ok. Note: Ask me how you can avoid losing your iPod! Answer: I don't know! I lost mine!

Our group of 13 went into Worley's Cave. It took roughly one hour to find and four hours to explore. It was dark in that cave...it sure was. I think the highlight was sitting around in the complete darkness for several minutes, snacking and chatting. Oh, yeah, and getting out alive. That was cool, too.

Some of our Korean friends brought a delicacy that for the sake of simplicity we will call "stinkyfruit". It looked exotic and smelled quite craptacular. It smelled like rotten meat and scared many of the weaker stomached drunks away. I, however, have a very strong iron-like stomach, especially when empowered by strong social lubricants and an even stronger affinity to show up a man any chance I get. So I ate it. At first, it tasted like the rotten meat that it smelled of. Then it started to taste like cheese. Then it started tasting sweet. At the point where it started to taste sweet, I swallowed and all was well. I repeated this experiment twice and lived. I also didn't complain about the smell until I ate guacamole the next day and I swear it tasted just like rotten meat. I would rather be a fan of guacamole than stinkyfruit because stinkyfruit costs $20 a pop from a Korean grocer and I just can't work that into my fruit budget.

I highly recommend AOC events, Korean stinkyfruit, and responsible drinking.